I know it’s Friday but I’ve got a lot on my mind that I didn’t have time to share yesterday so you might want to grab yourself some tea or something because this is a long one.
Right now I’m considering skipping my training run. Right now, I’m looking back on my last two training week and noticed a trend in missing runs. Right now, I’m not sure what I am doing.
I’ve had this conversation with myself for a few weeks now. A while back I mentioned that I felt like I was in a limbo and I thought that signing up for RunAjax might help. Well, it didn’t. I just have this feeling in my gut. That I’m losing the joy of running. That running is starting to become a chore. I can’t tell if this is because I’m struggling with my weight (again) or if it’s lingering feelings from the Mississauga half marathon.
I know my coach wants me to keep building this season because I was doing so well. I was injury-free and it was going to be a great time to add mileage and build onto what I already had. Last week I somehow banged out 2 sub 5 minute 1Ks back to back after a ton of food and missing interval runs multiple times. I felt like at times, there was gas in my legs. I was able to just push out those runs without too much effort and it surprised it. It gave me some motivation to continue my training – to not give up what I’ve worked for.
However, I just don’t feel like it. I’ve seem to have lost that drive to dig for a faster me. To be honest, I’m not really sure what’s up. I want to be able to go out for day 13 milers but it seems like I’ve lost my legs! I’ve been getting exhausted doing anything over 5K continuous the last few weeks. To be fair, I’ve been having trouble sleeping and my schedule has been flipped upside down for me so my adjustment period hasn’t been going too well. I have been loving the gym recently though. I love lifting weights and I love how I feel afterwards. Especially after neglecting my upper body for over a year, it felt good to feel “strong.”
So why am I rambling on and on about this? Well I just wanted to show you that not everything is freaking sunshine and rainbows. I’ve been feeling a little down about myself as I’ve been glued to Instagram recently and everyone doing “fun easy 20 milers” day in and day out and made me question why I wasn’t doing fun and easy 20 milers. Why am I struggling when I put in so much work over the winter. Why can’t I be happy and go out and run without struggling to finish. These are the thoughts that have been plaguing me. I’ve had a few emails from readers asking me for tips for motivation as they’ve been in a slump and well, here I am, in a slump too! I honestly think I might just try to ride this out and see how it goes. I will have a sit down with my coach after the long weekend and see what this gut feeling of mine is about and maybe we can lure that drive I had in me over the winter back out!
Who knows what the next few weeks will hold for me. I’ll just have to wait and see.
QOTD: How do you get out of a slump?
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Linking up this post with Amanda from Running with Spoons for Thinking Out Loud Thursday.