Inside My Mind / Running Updates

Thoughts on Scotiabank Half Marathon

thoughts on scotiabank marathon

Honestly, my only thoughts on my upcoming half marathon is fear. Fear and disappointment. I had spent the winter base building and it was pretty difficult for me as winter was killing my ITB. Regardless, I survived the winter and moving onto Spring, I was running around 35k a week – which is where I usually peak – and had pretty high hopes for my fall half marathon. I was easily doing sub 60 10k training runs, moving from 6:30min/k to 6:00min/k as my easy pace, and generally feeling pretty good!

However, during late Spring, things started to go downhill. My ITB refused to let up. Shin splints plagued me. It hurt to run more than 4k. However, things had started to look up when I managed to run TYS10K in 55 minutes. Not a PR but progress! But of course, my underlying issues were still there.

ITB pain, shin splints, and a stint with antibiotics ended up putting me at 10k a week. A far cry from 35k. Note – I only run 3 times a week so that’s pretty much 3.3k a run…7k less than what I was used to.

This was with 2ish months to go to race day and I was beyond worried and well, with less than 40 days to go now, I’m just plain scared. I know it won’t be a PR race – at this point, I just want to be able to finish the race itself. I won’t lie and say that it’s all sunshine and butterflies over here as I really am disappointed in myself.

Disappointed that my legs couldn’t perform like they did last year, disappointed that I didn’t go see a physical therapist early (hey – broke student here), and disappointed in myself for feeling so down. There are people out there with worse injuries than myself and they are whining about it less. Rebecca from Running Food Baby had to drop down from the full marathon to the half and she’s not whining!

I guess what I’m trying to say is with less than 40 days to race day, I fear that I won’t be able to run the full distance and I’m disappointed at myself for the pity party. The race will still be there next year and I can always change my goal race as it’s not set in stone.

And before I end this post, I’m going to leave with a quote that I’m going to try to go by for the upcoming weeks that you may find useful for the future. “Can you live in that moment?  As best you can, with clear eyes, and love in your heart.  With joy in your heart.  If you can do that, then you’re perfect.”

How do you cope when things don’t go as planned?

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<3 Carmy

18 thoughts on “Thoughts on Scotiabank Half Marathon

  1. I’m so sorry dear. It just sucks, plain and simple, and I’m not going to pretend otherwise. I hope that you surprise yourself and have an amazing race, but I know it will be tough. All I have to say is find a new goal for the race. Like the most high fives or something. Make it not about the time and (hopefully) not about the pain.

  2. Super sorry to hear about your injuries!! Setbacks are unfortunately a part of life but luckily they can remind us of the important things in life – just like your quote says! A setback is also good for reminding us how much running means to us – we GET to run, we don’t HAVE to run.
    Even if a Goal is not attainable this time, there are always so many next times. Just go out there and enjoy yourself and try your best!:)

    Ps – can I just say how refreshing it is to read a blog that uses kilometres?!

  3. I hear you – not being able to fully run your “goal race” can be heartbreaking. I may not be whining on social media/my blog (although I think I have at least a couple of times), but trust me, still very bummed out about it. I will probably be looking at all the marathoners on STWM day and be disappointed that I’m not getting the gold marathoner medal this year. BUT – I’m still looking forward to the half. There are a number of us that are injured/coming back from injury registered for the half. We can all stumble to the finish together. Heck, I’m lucky if I even make it beyond 16K in training 😉

  4. Holy Pity Parade Carmyy!

    You’re still going to do great. Probably not as good as last year, but likely much better than you’ll do in 30 years. It’s Toronto’s biggest race, and one of the best organized. I’m going to be happy just to be a part of it. You should be too.

    (See you there??)

  5. I feel for you, Carmy! I thought I’d finally be able to break a sub-60m 10K in time for the Toronto Zoo Run, but I dislocated a bone in my foot (cuboid syndrome) and my kpw went down to almost nothing.

    I’m sad that I didn’t reach my goal, but I’m still super happy that I’m still able to participate in any kind of race! After all, running isn’t about winning or just going faster… it’s about taking the journey even if it’s through tears and pain.

    There’s also an article in Runner’s World that I think you should read. It’s called Dead Freakin’ Last… and Proud of It! 🙂

  6. I’m bummed for you, Carmy. Running is so tough and sometimes despite our best effort, plans get derailed. Do your best to let go of that fear and just make the best of where you are now. Hugs!

  7. I had to drop out of a race due to injury once and it sucked so hard. I wanted to do the race SO badly, but I just knew pushing myself on an injury would be bad news bears. Injuries suck. Pain sucks. Not being able to do what you want sucks. There’s no denying that, and you’re totally allowed to whine about it for a bit – but then get up and do everything you can to make the situation better. Try to take it easy and get healthy before you push yourself too hard. Like you said, the race will be there next year.

  8. I know that dropping out of or down in a race sucks. But it’s part of a runners life and everyone pretty much has to do it at some point. It’s not worth risking injuring yourself further. If you decide to go ahead with the half I suggest a lot of walking. No time goals, just try to have fun at the race and interact with the crowds for motivation.

  9. All you can do is try your best, and remember that by not meeting your goal you won’t be disappointing anybody, even if you think you are. We’re always our worst critic and its hard to not feel down about not being able to potentially meet goal, but just remember that you’ve tried your best. 🙂

  10. Hey! You can whine and complain all you want! It does suck that your body is not in the best place right now, but that’s out of your control! It’s refreshing to hear a little whining b/c we’re all cry babies at some point! Hang in there and keep us posted! 🙂

  11. It’s ok to be disappointed about the race not likely going the way you want. It happens to runners all the time, but somehow that doesn’t make it easier. I’ve run a lot of slow races for a variety of reasons and I just try to find something else to like about it. Hope you can find some fun in the race!

  12. I SOO feel your pain…I’m currently recovering from a blot clot in my lung that side lined me for nearly 2 months. I’m currently starting over…feeling like I’ve never run in my life…let alone 4 marathons. The disappointment is real…I cuss myself out almost every run…but then I encourage myself and tell myself…it will get better. Try not to be so hard on yourself…it’s not your fault. Poor training due to excuses is one thing…not being able to train due to injuries…is tough to deal with…but not your fault. Be careful out there…just finish…not to minimize your feelings but there will be other races. And just think…not everyone can complete a half marathon…you can! chin up! 🙂

  13. That just plain sux but sometimes we just have to take a real look at what we are capable of at the time and make a decision. I signed up for the LI Marathon this past spring and due to injuires and a rough winter I ended up dropping down to the 10K. Best decision I ever made.

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